Saturday, December 3, 2022

Mendocino County Grapples With Two Troubling Domestic Violence Incidents Over the Weekend—Remember, There Is Always Help

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On Friday night, a husband in Ukiah tragically killed his wife with a shotgun and then turned the gun on himself. 

Yesterday afternoon, an argument between an Anderson Valley man and his female partner would result in him burning her property which resulted in a stand-off between him and law enforcement. Thankfully, he would surrender without any violence.

As our community deals with the trauma rippling out from these two events, we want to provide information and resources that could help someone in the grips of intimate partner violence

First, consider a passage from Haruki Murakami’s novel IQ84 that captures the paradox of being a victim of domestic violence:

“I am living in hell from one day to the next. But there is nothing I can do to escape. I don’t know where I would go if I did. I feel utterly powerless, and that feeling is my prison. I entered of my own free will, I locked the door, and I threw away the key.”

The National Coalition Against Domestic Violence offers some startling statistics about intimate partner violence in California:.

  • 34.9 % of California women and 31.1% of California men experience intimate partner physical violence, intimate partner sexual violence and/or intimate partner stalking in their lifetimes.
  • 65% of all murder-suicides involve an intimate partner; 96% of the victims of these crimes are female.

The University of California, Davis published a study entitled, COVID-19, Intimate Partner Violence and Communication Ecologies, which concluded that 10% of participants experienced intimate partner violence during the pandemic. Furthermore, those that experienced intimate partner violence, experienced more “stress globally” than those who had not experienced it.

Project Sanctuary is a Mendocino County domestic violence shelter that provides support and care in Ukiah, Fort Bragg, Willits, Booneville, and Point Arena. Victims of domestic violence can find many services at Project Sanctuary including legal advocacy for survivors seeking restraining orders, accompaniment and advocacy for sexual assault victims who are experiencing an evidence collection exam at the ER, transitional housing, a 24/7 crisis line, support groups, prevention education, and a safe and confidential emergency shelter. 

The following are domestic violence resources available in Mendocino County and surrounding areas:


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Matt LaFever
Matt LaFever
I like to think of myself as a journalist for the everyman. Journalism has become a craft practiced largely by the urban elite. It’s time to take it back. I have been an Emerald Triangle resident since 2006 and this is year ten in Mendocino County. Please, email me at if you know a story that needs to be told.

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